WHAT IF....WE'D SAID NO?

We’ve always been an odd sort of couple in some ways.  Just ask anyone who knows us.  Over fifty years of marriage we’ve tended to commit to, get involved in, plan, orchestrate, and participate in just about every opportunity to serve that came our way.  Now, some might say we over committed, that we stretched ourselves too thin, paid a cost that was too great.  While that may in some small way be true (you might want to get our kids opinion) we probably wouldn’t change a thing.  

Most of this over achieving practice began early in our marriage.  It just sorta crept up on us.  We became heavily involved in church activities including picking up kids on the church bus, three times a week, working at church camp, teaching classes, participating in Bible hour and vacation Bible school, and then leading the youth group. I can’t even tell you how many pots of chili I made on a very small stove at our fall retreats or how many miles Big Al drove that barely road worthy bus. There were banquets, retreats, Sunday night devos, Polaroid scavenger hunts, and having a house that was always open.    

At year ten of our marriage, we were faced with an opportunity to move to south Florida for Al’s work.  We’d lived in Dickson County our whole lives and really thought we always would, lo and behold, we took the leap.  It turned out to be a great decision even though we were gripped with fear in the beginning.  Then we stepped it up twenty years in and decided to adopt a thirteen year-old boy.  Looking back, we were rather naive, but we did have a heart full of love to offer this broken son.  

The years that followed were so full.  They involved both heart break, joy, highs, and lows.  We experienced loss and God’s amazing faithfulness and provision.  We went on medical mission trips to Mexico eight times.   Then at year thirty-eight after God closing every other door, we moved to Long Island, NY to work with the Timothy Hill Children’s Ranch. When we crossed the George Washington Bridge in New York City pulling a loaded horse trailer, I literally cried.  It was definitely a “we’re not in Kanas anymore” moment.  While at the Ranch we were nurse, farm manager, horseback riding instructor, maintenance, and house parents.  How we loved the boys and the staff.

Then unbelievably, while at the Ranch, we had the opportunity to go the Uganda, Africa on more medical mission trips.  Along with a wonderful team of serving, loving people, we made that trip for three years.  When I was young if anyone had told me I would make three trips to Africa, I would never have believed it.  

Now in our “golden years” we find ourselves living like gypsies.  Several months of the year we travel in our RV and serve wherever the need is.  Along the way we see some amazing places and best of all meet amazing people.  We sold our farm when I retired, so we no longer have a permanent “home”.  

There’s something about getting older, seeing friends pass away, and the realization of just how short this earthly life is that have me reminiscing.  I’m rather nostalgic and sentimental now.  I think back a lot over this life we’ve lived.  Did we do it well?  Did we take the opportunities that God had planned for us in advance?  Did we love well?

In all of that I’ve been thinking a lot about what if’s.  And one thing that I think about is the what if we’d said no.  What if we’d said no to all that work at church and the youth group?  How many men and women and their children have been impacted by the love we showed them.  What if we’d said no to adopting a young man without hope?  How much different might his life have been?  What if we’d said no to all those treks to Mexico?  How many lives would have gone without the medical treatment, a tender touch, and the hope we were able to offer?  What if we’d said no to moving to NY?  After all, who does that?  We loved our farm and our life in middle Tennessee,  How many sweet troubled boys lives were changed because of our presence there?  What if we’d said no to the Africa medical missions, the traipsing across America serving, the classes we taught, the people we helped, the trading of His plans for ours?

I want to say clearly that this is not an effort to pat ourselves on the back.  Everything we are and have been is because of a patient loving God that we whole heartedly and willing serve.  Everything we have is his and only flows through our hands.  But I think it’s important to reflect and take the rearview mirror look at our lives, to take stock of where we are and how we will finish this life.  

I am convinced that because we chose to say YES to God’s plans, our lives have been blessed beyond measure.  While the blessings are not material, they are eternal.  I am convinced that many lives have been blessed by our yeses.  Now that we are older we run into people that have come into our paths over the years.  We get to hear the stories of how “that one devotion changed my life”, that Bible class taught me so much”, “you and Big Al loved me and I knew it”.  I recently ran into a lady on Long Island that introduced me as her mentor, the one who taught her the Bible.  I was so humbled and grateful that God had allowed me to be his vessel.

In many cases the yes took a whole lot of courage and a whole lot of faith trusting that God knew best and that He had it all under control.  Now I know that his plan was perfect all along and so much better than the one I had in mind, even though the two looked nothing alike.  So, I encourage you to say yes! Say yes even when the next step looks scary, when your faith is wavering, when you’d really rather stay safe and comfortable.  Safety and comfort are, after all, overrated!  I can promise you that as the years fly by, you too will look back and be ever so thankful that you said YES!